The ABC's of Phobias

You all probably already know that there are many different types of phobias out there. However, I have taken it upon myself to find one for each letter of the alphabet. Educate yourself.

Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. I want to meet someone with this phobia. Because peanut butter is delicious. And though it's sometimes annoying when it sticks to the roof of your mouth, it's hardly terrifying.
Barophobia- Fear of gravity. What goes up, must come down. And I guess that scares some people.
Coulrophobia- Fear of clowns. I'm pretty sure I have this phobia.. Clowns are scary! They're all up in your face, covered in make-up so you can't tell who they are, and wearing hideous clothing. They're a little too happy. Plus, who in their right mind would want to be a clown? Nobody, that's who! Only the crazies who are also capable of murder.
Deipnophobia- Fear of dining or dinner conversations. Ugh...small-talk. Nobody likes it.
Ephebiphobia- Fear of teenagers. Highly understandable. What with all their new-fangled talk and walking around with their pants either sagging to their ankles or tighter than a fat kid's grip on a twinkie...it's hard not to be frightened.
Francophobia- Fear of France or French culture. They did invent the guillotine. Just sayin. Also they serve ridiculously tiny amounts of food for ridiculously high prices.
Geniophobia- Fear of chins. Really? Come on now.
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia- Fear of long words. Ohhhh, the irony.
Iatrophobia- Fear of going to the doctor or of doctors. Have you ever felt that stethoscope?? They keep that thing in the freezer! The second it touches your skin you can't help but scream! Also, they like poking you with needles. Blech.
Judeophobia- Fear of Jews. You Nazi.
Kathisophobia- Fear of sitting down. What, are you afraid your butt will meld to the chair? Lets be reasonable.
Logophobia- Fear of words. This would be interesting...."Hi *scream* I *scream* have *scream* Logophobia *scream*."
Mnemophobia- Fear of memories. Guy 1: "Hey remember that one time when-" Guy 2: "NOOOO!!"
Numerophobia- Fear of numbers. How would you ever get a date if you couldn't ask for their number?
Omphalophobia- Fear of belly buttons. Ummm....yeah. I have nothing to say to that. That's just weird.
Porphyrophobia- Fear of the color purple. No Barney for you!
Quadraphobia- Fear of quartets, or getting drawn and quartered. Okay, no one has been drawn and quartered since like the 1300's. Really. Wikipedia says so. (So it must be true.) Quartets...barbershop ones can be a little disturbing sometimes, but usually only if they're holding chainsaws/guns or running really fast with scissors.
Rhytiphobia- Fear of getting wrinkles. My advice? Don't get old.
Scelerophibia- Fear of bad men, burglars. Because there is nothing worse than that moment when you're all alone in the house, it's dark, and you hear a noise...and you accept the fact that you're going to die.
Testophobia- Fear of taking tests. Another entirely understandable one, especially at BYU. Tests are scary. And it's a well-known fact that the Testing Center is the most prayed-in building on campus.
Urophobia- Fear of urine or urinating. People with this phobia must sound like they're giving birth every time they go pee, what with all the terrified screaming. Their poor roommates.
Vestiphobia- Fear of clothing. ...And now we know how nudist colonies are formed.
Walloonphobia- Fear of the Walloons. Okay, but what the heck are Walloons?
Xylophobia- 1) Fear of wooden objects. 2) Forests. Kind of a double-whammy, considering that forests are made from wooden objects. (Trees, in case you didn't catch that.)
Ymophobia- Fear of contrariety. So, what, they see opposing colors side by side and faint of fear? I want to play a checkers game with them. Black & White, plus opposing teams. And we'll get someone to strike up an argument nearby. Who's with me??
Zemmiphobia- Fear of the great mole rat. Woah. I mean, I've heard of the Great Pumpkin...and the naked mole rat from Kim Possible...but the great mole rat?? Sounds scary enough to me.